I hear what you're saying, but I'm not really advocating this is "the answer." I'm arguing that it is *an* answer that spouses should seriously consider, rather than tossing it immediately as an impossibility or an inherently undesirable situation.
To your incel point, I don't think it's crazy to advertise your desires -- If a dude were to say, "I'd love to support a partner financially if that partner is interesting in taking on the domestic labor" I'd say go for it, man! There's plenty of women who would be into that, and it's good to be upfront about your desires. And if you can't find a partner who wants that arrangement, maybe re-evaluate whether your desires are practical. The point I'm really trying to make is that there's a lot of different family structures out there, and you should ask yourself and your partner what you both really want -- then do it, even if it doesn't follow social norms.